Soft Knees

I have often wondered why there seems to be a power void in much of the American church... I hear and read stories from, what I would consider, very reliable sources - stories of crushed bones being restored, miraculous escapes from prison, amazing visions and experiences, supernatural provision that boggles the mind, etc. - and yet I am left with the haunting question..."why don't I see it?"

I guess I could be one of those that just fake it through life - to teach and preach these things but never really see them...but I don't want to do that. In fact, that is not faith. That is a lie and God is not in it. I want the real deal or nothing at all...

I've been spending the last few years thinking about this issue and trying to figure out what the difference is between myself and them. Why is God honoring them and not me? The answer I have come to was/is shocking...at least for me...

Prayer...

That's the one thing that's different. All of these people who are operating on a level unfamiliar to me have that one thing in common. They pray. And I don't just mean they spend 15 minutes in prayer in a day and think they've done something. I'm talking all night prayer vigils... I'm talking hours and hours in direct communion with the Divine... I'm talking sacrifice...giving stuff up...pain...uncomfortableness...selfless intercession for self and others...calloused knees...

Our brothers and sisters in Africa and China are calling the US the "Dark Continent." They are actually sending missionaries over here!!! There thought is that the American church has become too bent on comfort. O how I would love to disagree...and yet I won't spend the time on my knees with Him because I need my 6-7 hours of sleep...or I need my fix of entertainment...

It could not be more true for me. And then I ask why God is not jumping at my every word...

As my dear friend, Austin Cagle, told me: it's not about having the power to move a mountain. It's about being so intimate with Christ...to have such a relationship with Him...that His will has become your will and He honors every word you say. It's relationship.

A prayer by St. John Climacus:

My God, I pretend to nothing upon this earth, except to be so firmly united to You by prayer that to be separated from you may be impossible; let others desire riches and glory; for my part, I desire but one thing, and that is, to be inseparably united to you, and to place in you alone all my hopes of happiness and repose.